The number one thing people tell me when they find out I'm training for a marathon is:
"I don't know how you do it."
Followed closely by:
"I could never do that."
It is those comments that really make me think. How did I get to this place? Am I really going to be able to train for a marathon? Do I have what it takes to do 20+ mile long runs on three consecutive weekends before I even get to the marathon itself? How am I going to do this?
It all comes down to this single idea:
I am never going to do this again.
Let me tell you a story. When I was running my second half marathon, I ran all the way to mile seven. It was the longest I had ever run without stopping and I was so proud of myself. I was going to start walking when I realized that I didn't really need to, so I pushed to mile eight. Once I got to mile eight I came to a very startling realization.
I was two miles away from running double digit miles.
It is that thought that pushed me through mile 9. Everything hurt, I was being passed by walkers, technically I could have strolled faster than I was "running" but I was determined to get to mile 10. All I could think was "Honestly Maria, when is the next time you are going to be running these kinds of numbers? When is the next time you are going to get this opportunity. Keep. Going"
And that is where I am at right now.
While I'm not feeling 100% during my runs (its still too damn hot) I am feeling better than ever. I'm running faster for longer distances and honestly I just don't know when I am ever going to be in better shape. At this point, it is easier to keep going than to accept the fact that if I stop, I'll have to start all over again.
Running started off as an escape for me. With three boys under the age of two I thought I was going to lose my mind. Money was tight, I had no idea what I was doing or if I was even doing a good job, the babies wouldn't let me sleep for longer than an hour (not an exaggeration), this went on for months. A friend started running about this time and watching her pace progress inspired me to start running. Most people I know who start running start out at a 10 minute mile, something I can only consider in my dizziest daydreams. I finally saw someone start running about as fast as I do and every week she slowly got faster. it was so inspiring that I started running.
Then something amazing happened. When I ran, I was so busy gasping for air and trying not to die that all my worries and doubts disappeared. For a short while my mind was blessed clear of all the negative thoughts that I berate myself with every day. It was addicting. And just like any junkie I slowly acclimatized to the longer distances and faster paces and I needed more. Now I'm running double digit runs on the weekends, just last weekend I ran 13 miles without stopping and I did it at a great pace.
I'm still not training for a marathon more than once. But when am I ever going to get to do this again? When am I ever going to have this opportunity? These are the thought that keep me going during my long runs.
And if you're wondering if you have what it takes to train and run a marathon - you do. We all do. We just need the right reasons.
Mine just so happens to be that I never want to do this again, so I might as well do it right and do it right now.
😂
-Ri
